Stepping Up

So I have been surrounded by TV shows, quotes and articles on Stepping up.

So ‘Stepping up’ what is that all about – well, for me it is all about removing yourself from the comfort zone, from the floor that you are currently lying on flat on your face and feeling sorry for yourself.

I used to be all about comfort zones, the last few years before I decided to ‘step up’ was all about staying in the same place, doing the same thing and making sure that my fears won’t get triggered.

So then the Universe obviously forced me to ‘step up’ or find a new comfort zone. I chose to ‘step up’ and got into this new profession of mine. But then you go ok cool, I have stepped up now I can again get back into my next comfort zone of my new profession and life. And me I love a good comfort zone, with nice blankies and cushions and TV set on romantic comedies – happy place. And then just as I start to settle, again there the Universe goes – ‘come on Yolandi, can’t just sit on the couch and be happy with the new life you have created’ – noooo, then I get given more challenges and changes.

Now the thing is, that despite my love of comfort zones I have lately realised, through a lot of introspection and fantastic life lessons that the only way I get to do cooler stuff and to grow and to get to a happy state is by pushing myself and ‘stepping up’ even more. Assessing what scares the sh*t out of me and make sure that I do that.

I know, why you ask, why woman why?

Because I can!

So as most of you know I am still and forever struggling with my public speaking issue, so what do I do, I go and book speaking slot and create workshops so I get to speak to more people. Yes, I know crazy!!

But my theory is that if I don’t face the beast head on I will never ever be able to live with it and it will always be the most scary thing in my life.

And guess what, it is working, each time I get up there and I open my mouth it gets a little itsy bitsy bit better. Even so much that yesterday after my talk I felt happy and I thought I don’t want to stop doing this, it might become a new comfort zone even….

So for all of you out there who gets to read this – what scares the pants of you? What makes you want to throw up and crawl into a hole? Find that and do more of it, face that beast because guess what it might be the happiest place you could find for yourself.  Take some time and think about what makes you freak out, why does it make you freak out and then go and do it!

No more fear, it is overrated and way too debilitating for my liking, so my list of scary stuff is damn long, I have lots of stepping up to do.  Can’t wait to get going!!

Much love Yolandi xxx

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Authentic Self

So this week I seem to be inundated with all kinds of things to do with being your authentic self.

I have joined a beautiful course from Rebecca Campbell, she is one of my favourite people in the world, she wrote a book called Light is the New Black. It is really a book for Light workers to come out and shine their light in the world. I read this book last year and really helped me to step out of the closet, it helped me to deal with the fact that I am just a tad different from most people and it helped me deal with the fact that I am on one hell of a spiritual journey and that I choose to do this for myself.

So the course started this week and there are hundreds of women in the group speaking out about who they truly are at Soul level. Speaking up about how they fear the judgement from people out there, their family, their friends and everyone around them.

Then I saw a lovely article yesterday from a lady here in South Africa that also wrote about her journey as a healer and explaining how it all happened for her.

And other discussions during the week with clients and with Soul friends about being your authentic self. My Wednesday Wisdom that came through was about Authentic Self too.

So I am thinking that the Universe maybe wants me to think about this a bit and also write about this a bit.

So it took me quite a while to figure out my Authentic Self. I was not one of those ‘lucky’ people who knew at 14 that I was special and that I was connected with the Universe in some profound way. Nope, not me. I lead an awesome life, travelled, loved, lived and made money and just enjoyed being here on earth.  Until somewhere in my 20s no matter how much nice things I did for other people there was always this weird hole inside, no amount of partying, travelling, wine or hanging out with friends could fill this baby. So I went through huge stuff in my late twenties, bouts of unexplained depression, unhappy marriage, divorce etc etc. But lucky for me I ended up with Rob (thank you Universe) and him giving me space to actually try and be me really worked. I did not have to pretend for the first time in my life, I could actually just be my weird and wacky self with no judgement. He does that really well actually despite his nickname of ‘The Judge’. Then my beautiful boy was born and I started really looking deep inside. Then I met an amazing women who really taught me so much about my spiritual self and about the Universe, I started reading books and exploring and connecting with me. Then I went for my own Akashic Record reading and then I was presented with who I am at Soul level.

I think we all deep inside know who we are, but we LOVE making everyone else happy, making choices that goes against what we want and need – and that is what I realised, for most of my twenties this is what I did, my job, my marriage all of it was for other people, for what I thought would work for them but none of it was what I really wanted. BUT I chose to do this, I chose to do stuff for them and not for me.

And then when I got told who I am through my reading I realised that this might be the problem. I did not align to this, I was not me, I was not that amazing being that was deep inside. I mean I was pretty awesome as a person, don’t get me wrong, I did nice things for people, I was not evil or a serial killer but I was not the real me.  The real me was not suppose to sit there every day and create mobile banking apps for other people alone in front of my PC, writing specs and analysing systems.  The real me was suppose to interact with people, the real me knew how to listen to people and to help them heal. I knew this on a deeper level, considering that everyone was ALWAYS talking to me and sharing their life stories and their pain and their problems. So I guess I should have know but I did not realise that this was sort of my thing, this was what my Soul was crying out to do because it was who I was, who I am!

But alas why listen immediately…. it is much more fun to stay in your comfort zone of good working hours, good pay and good solid routine. But then the Universe always has a much better plan, the Universe invented retrenchment!!! My favourite thing in the whole world (she says sarcastically!). So now that I knew what I had to do and chose not to throw myself into it the Universe decided to see how serious I was and got me full on retrenched after 7 years consulting from home. Nooooooo, my world semi crumbled. It was freaking awful, I was making good money, I had time as I only worked 4 days a week and now it all was going to stop and go away.  So nothing like the rug being pulled out from under your feet.

So it was a HUGE choice, go and find a real job with traffic and 5 days a week 7am to 6pm busy-ness OR try something brand new……

So I chose new and unknown, I chose no idea what the hell I was going to do, I chose fear and I chose uncertainty!

Insane I know, but thank goodness for Rob and his support.

So I started on the biggest journey of my life, I found myself, I found my gifts and I found my connection with the Universe. Here I am today doing past life readings for people, reading Akashic Records, healing people and connecting with my Guides on a daily basis.

The minute I gave up control and let the Universe steer it got easier and this path unfolded for me.
I had to learn that I can not control anything, that I can not choose where this goes but I have to trust.
This does not mean sitting on my butt waiting for things to happen, waiting for clients to walk through the door, waiting to learn new skills and to enhance my intuition and my connection with the Universe.  All of this takes a lot of work and practice, BUT trusting that I will be guided is what got me to this happy place….

So thank you Universe for my journey and for letting me find my Authentic Self!
And thank you husband for backing me all the way – I know he still does not understand all this weird stuff that I do for a living but the strapline in our house for it is – ‘It is weird but it works’.

 

Much love

The Authentic Yolandi xxx

 

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Slow Down

Healing Somerset West

Slow Dance

Have you ever watched kids on a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly’s erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading light?
You better slow down.

Time is short
The music won’t last
Do you a run through each day on the fly?
When you ask, “How are you?”
Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done, do you lie in your bed,
With the next hundred chores running through your head?

You’d better slow down
Don’t dance so fast
Time is short
The music won’t last

Ever told your child,
We’ll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch, let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say “Hi”

You’d better slow down
Don’t dance so fast
Time is short
The music won’t last

When you run so fast to get somewhere,
You miss half the fun of getting there
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift…
Thrown away.

Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over….


I just saw this again by accident and it immediately grabbed my attention.

We have become so consumed by busy-ness. Running around like headless chickens every single day. I always wonder what it was like living 50 years ago, no TV, no internet, no cellphones. Just you your chair and the patio outside. Sitting there watching the world go past, being able to just be and breathe. How lovely!

And today we have to make a conscious choice to slow down, back then it was just part of who people where. But it all comes down to making that choice, making the choice to stop and take time to just be and breathe.

People so often complain about not being able to connect with the Universe and their Guides and my first question is when last did you sit still, be quiet and listen.

This weekend make some time to actually be quiet, to just sit en be.  The Universe is standing out there with bated breath waiting to talk to you, there is so much to say, so give it a chance. Make some quiet time for you!!!

Much love

Yolandi

 

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